Monday, May 16, 2011

Funny Jokes Collection

Examiner:What is Microsoft Excel student:It is a new brand of Surf Excel to clean the computer.
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What a woman wants is what you are out of. She wants more of a thing when it is scarce.
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Appu: I want you to explain why I have to wear these same old clothes. Pappu: Bcoz if u don`t, you could scare the dog.
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Banta: What is the best way to see flying saucers? Santa: Pinch the waitress.
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Appu: Do you know that it is not fall that kills you, it is the sudden stop at the end.
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Pappu: When is it unlucky to see a black cat? . . . . . . . Appu: When you are a mouse.
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Bunny (to receptionist of hotel): Can you give me a room and a bath? Receptionist: I can gve u a room, but u vl hav 2 hav bath urself.
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Whats d difference between ppl who pray in Temples and ppl who pray in Exam Centres? Those in d exam centres r damn serious.
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All of our politicians play KBC in reverse manner. They make crores and crores first and then answer the questions later.

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Appu: I have been trying to think of a word for two weeks. Pappu: Its a fortnight.
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Wife: Can u explain 2 me how dis lipstick got on ur collar? Husband: No,I really cant.I distinctly remembrd havng taken my shirt off.

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Lady: When you are finished with me, will my husband think I am beautiful? Beautician: May be, does he still drink a lot?
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Pappu: The planes are so fast these days that there is no time to get acquainted with the air hostess.

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Preeto: I won't marry you, and you know why? Jeetho: No, I can't think. Preeto: That's why.

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Father: When I was a young man, girls knew how to blush. Son: What did you say to them?

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A sign in a cafe: All drinking water in this cafe has been passed by the management.

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Pappu: Doctor: I am having trouble with my breathing. Doctor: I will give you something that will soon stop that.
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Preeto: Were you excited the first time you asked your husband for money? Jeeto: Oh, I was calm and collected.
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Appu: Would you consider going out with a man like me? Pappu: Yes, so long as he is not too much like you.

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Insurance policy is an old man's passport to young women.

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